I witnessed her sacrifices causing irreversible damage to her health and personal happiness. As a child, I literally put on her big, ‘church best’ shoes, and modelled her steadfast power with wobbly laughter. My own mother primed me for my ancestral cloak of ‘Strong Black Woman’ protection, before I could even walk properly. The former, acts an ancestral protective cloak, the latter, a cursed shroud of racist neglect. I believe the superwoman schema needs to be unpacked into its survival qualities, and its dehumanising qualities, to properly understand our complex relationship to it as Black women. The Ancestral Cloak of Protection, The Racist Shroud of Neglect She notes that these high effort coping strategies, are often a façade of strength that cost Black women their health to uphold.
Psychologist, Cheryl Woods Giscombé, describes how the Black ‘Superwoma n Schema’ is a social historical legacy, that has been passed on by our foremothers with the imperative to survive. Obviously, we can’t reasonably live up to this superhero image, but we are certainly under a lot of pressure to die trying. The phenomenon of the ‘Strong Black Woman’ has long been a revered archetype in the Black community. The Phenomenon of the Strong Black Woman – A Blessing and A Curse We have a right to be protected from it, even if we are perceived to be ‘Strong Black Women’: Our bruises may be hiding in plain sight. Coercive control is a criminal offence under the new Domestic Abuse Act 2021. I know from personal experience, that many ‘Strong Black Women’, are isolated behind closed doors, coping alone with self-doubt, intense fear, and deep shame – all psychological effects of coercive control. If the police can’t even see the physical bruises on a Black woman’s skin, what hope do we have that they will see our psychological ones, when we are widely perceived to be so strong? Most domestic abuse doesn’t leave any bruises, because it’s about the perpetrator systematically messing with your head, to undermine, intimidate and control you. Some officers say: I don’t see any bruising …It’s because of our black skin”. “Too often, if you go to a police station, you don’t get beyond reception. The dedicated staff support Black women of African-Caribbean heritage to feel inherently valued and protected from abuse. Unapologetically Black Yoga has proudly tended to Black women, in solidarity with Sistah Space, a domestic violence charity, set up in response to the murder of Valerie Forde. Recent research from Refuge the largest (funded) provider of domestic abuse services in the UK, documented that when Black women report domestic abuse to the police, they are less likely to be perceived to need specialist support – denying them access to vital lifelines for their prospect of survival. How is this possible? I mean, how the hell is this possible? The officer’s note recorded the incident as a ‘threat to property’ and failed to intervene to protect Valerie and their young infant. Six weeks before she was killed, Valerie, a Black woman from Hackney, told the police that she feared for her life, because her ex-partner had threatened to set the house on fire with them inside. This heinous crime made me wonder how many people know the name of Valerie Forde? In 2014 Valerie Forde and her 22 month old daughter were horrifically murdered by her ex-partner. Quite rightly, there was a national outcry when police officer Wayne Couzens, was recently convicted in the UK, for the savage rape and murder of Sarah Everard. Oya Heart Warrior (Msc CounsPsych, Registered trauma informed Yoga teacher, Reiki Master)īlack Women Don’t Bruise, Cry or Die When We Are Hurt? Learning to slow down, sprawling out and connecting to what we sense and feel, is far more important to a vibrant people who have been overworked, displaced and systemically dehumanised.
As an experienced racial trauma, yoga teacher, I believe it is vital to offer Black people non-linear movement that is not confined to a mat or defined by how it looks. I founded Unapologetically Black Yoga to build compassionate spaces for Black people to move and breathe freely beyond the white gaze.
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